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Does she like me? Take control with these 4 tips

Door: Patrick Parker     In: Picking up women     Geplaatst: 07-09-2016

Specialized in Structured Game. Through his dedication he changed from a lovable nerd to a man that knows how to attract the ladies with a snap of his fingers.

Does she like me

Does she like me? From now on that’s up to you with these 4 insights

Are you ever at a bar talking to or hanging out with a girl and asking yourself “Does she like me?” In this article you are going to learn exactly how you can find out whether you are doing well and if she likes you.

You will learn, among other things:

  • The exact signals and steps to make her absolutely crazy about you
  • How to use Steve Jobs’ reality distortion field
  • The big reverse psychology signal you need to pay attention to
  • Why you are living in Friendzoneland, and how you can get out of it for good
  • How you can achieve more by doing less
  • What you can learn from a couple of 80s Aerobics dancers
Table of contents:

Signals that she likes me

During the last SummerBootcamp in Barcelona, I coached a participant in one of the popular clubs, Shoko. He was a good looking guy, but something kept going  wrong anyway. At one point, I just saw it. Every time he walked up to a girl or tried to talk to one, I saw him look at her with an all-saying expression like: “Did she like it? Did I do well?” He had thoroughly read up on the classic school of seduction beforehand. He had a comprehensive list of standard lines, stories, tricks and jokes. Everything he said had the purpose to make a good impression and hopefully make her like him. What do you think happened? All girls rejected him.

Sjoko Barcelona

I took him to Shoko’s outdoor area on the beach, and spoke with him for an hour. Then the penny dropped. Or rather, it hit like a bomb. He made a 180 degree turn in what he did and suddenly all the women liked him.

What I told him?

As a man, you are a leader. You take the lead in the conversation and you take the interaction forward to the point you want it to go. Kissing, phone number, sex, whatever you want. That is what a woman wants: a man who dares to take the lead, who she can trust and follow.

When you let a woman take the lead, not a lot will happen. It will go all over the place. She doesn’t WANT to take the lead.

When you are waiting for signals whether she likes you all the time, you immediately pass on the lead. She has to give you the signal “Oh, I like you” and then you move ahead one step.

NO, friend! That will make you unattractive! That’s why you should never wait for signals she likes you.

How do you know if a girl likes you?

Okay, but what should you do? How do you find out if a girl likes you?

INSIGHT 1: Do not wait for signals if she likes you, only pay attention to signals that she does not!

Look, the fact that she is still here talking to you and did not walk away or start ignoring you completely indicates  that you (still) have a chance. Until that moment, she likes you enough. Now it is up to you to take the lead and guide the conversation in the direction of your goal.


(It’s going to be a long wait if you are going to wait on these kind of signals ;) )

After you spend more time with her you start getting a bit more physical. You do not wait for a clear signal to go ahead or that you are allowed to kiss her, you turn up the heat yourself and you keep the lead. Touch her a little more, stroke her, give her a hug, dance, and eventually kiss her.

It is not until the moment that she gives a clear not now signal that you stop for a minute, take a step back and slowly start building again. As long as she keeps standing there with you and does not say “This is not the way I see you” seriously and clearly, it is still not a definite NO.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want you to turn into some kind of sexual predator, so be socially intelligent. Do not escalate too quickly, but keep on moving forward towards the thing you want to achieve. Two steps forward, one step back. That way you won’t pressure the interaction too much.


Have you ever been in the friendzone? Or do you even LIVE in it? You like her but she just sees you as a good friend.

That’s not on her, friend! You only have yourself to blame. You did not take the lead in your interaction with her and therefore you have set yourself up nicely for the friendzone.

When you wait too long before making moves in the early stages, I can guarantee you will end up in the friendzone, because you do not show her you are a man who wants more. You did not show her your intentions.

You are just there waiting until your hands touch “by accident”. Or until she gives you the signal that you can kiss her. However, what you should have done is push forward continually. You take the lead and you don’t need any signals. If she does not want to go further, you will notice soon enough.

How do you make someone like you

After this lifechanging insight for the participant, everything changed. Suddenly, you could see women fall for him by the dozen. This is because taking the lead has many implications.

You accept that you are the only one responsible for your enjoyment and your success. No one else.

Suddenly you are not looking for approval anymore. Do you recognize that feeling when you are talking with a woman and you are continually looking for approval? Whether she likes you or not and how much longer she wants to stay with you? If you take the lead yourself, if you are a real leader, you are only looking for signals of disapproval. You just assume that she either already thinks you are great or is about to find out that you are.

Insight 2: By not being occupied with whether or not she likes you, she will start liking you!

When you are in the zone and you feel good, you are actually not reactive to your environment anymore. You are cause and not consequence. You determine what you do and what is going to happen, and you have influence on the people around you instead of only reacting to your surroundings. This is extremely attractive to women, and it will gain you an irresistible charisma to men as well. You will create a reality distortion field around you with which you will pull everything and everyone into YOUR reality, as Steve Jobs’ employees called it.

In short, what is an attractive man to her:

Insight 3: You are attractive if you give less fucks and have more fun than she has

So how do you get into that state of leading? In the zone, where you actually don’t give a fuck and have a ridiculous amount of fun? The number one method is, if you are going out, by making the start of the evening all about having fun yourself, both with and without others. I encourage you to make a fool out of yourself every now and then so you will not be able to take yourself seriously anymore. Guaranteed success!

Another very effective method is the fuck it method. Have you ever experienced a moment where you had to or wanted to do something, but all kinds of fears and choices made that hard to do? Sometimes something happens, a drop that floods the bucket, that makes something snap inside your head and think: “You know what? Fuck it. I am just going to do it.” All of a sudden, you have superpowers. All your fear is gone and you just take off like a cannonball.

I dont give a f

When you are going out one night, or when you are with that one girl that has you stuck in the friendzone, tell yourself FUCK IT and just do everything that you secretly wanted to do all along and you know you should do.

Insight 4: After going FUCK IT, the best things happen.

What happens? You literally do not give a fuck anymore! And that’s exactly why you can have as much fun as you want.

Making someone fall in love with you

You have liked her for a while, but she almost looks through you. Or maybe you hang out with her a lot but nothing happened yet and you might be falling into the friendzone. How can you make someone fall in love with you?

First of all, everything you read above should also be applied here.

After that, the most important advice is using neediness management. Not only for your own neediness, but especially for hers. Also, you would like to show her characteristics of an attractive man.

On a high from the fucks not given

What else do you need, except for a leading attitude and not giving a fuck? True, it is good to learn how to flirt, how to be masculine and how to make your target value go through the roof. If you get the hang of these concepts and you start feeling and living through and through, then you will really start having huge successes with amazing women.

However, even if you do not understand all of them, but do end up in that state of flow, and you keep leading all your interactions forward, you will have some modest success. Simply because you keep the interaction moving forward.

Our participant went hard that night, as well as the days after. On a high of not giving a fuck and in the flow of leading women step by step, ending up at his apartment where he had a few really good nights.

Not a single fuck was given that night.
Only one, at the end.
The girl enjoyed the fuck a lot.

Related articles:

5 tips to get out of the friend zone and fix the nice guy syndromeApproaching women7 Kissing Tips: How To Kiss Without Any ReservationGoing out alone and picking up women


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